And then God said: This is really boring. I need to create something more exciting, something that does not act by instinct only. Something that eventually will develop into a free thinking being and does not need my supervision.
So, after deep self deliberation, he created Adam and Eve. These two were happy-go-lucky creatures, eating from the trees and the earth, and drinking from the rain, lakes and rivers. they had no need for clothes because they did not know yet about that and besides because fashion had not yet been invented.
Therefore, they roamed along their unfenced garden totally nude. Adam with his two lower bouncing and hanging protruding attachments ; and Eve with also her two, upper, eventually also hanging rounded assets (or liabilities).
Then one day God noticed that Adam and Eve were getting tired of each other and came up with a solution. It was not going to be a simple one as he decided that this would happen as as chain of events, kind of a suspense movie of Hitchcock proportions.
Thus, he brought into the picture a snake. a talking snake. A very conniving snake. This reptile started the ball rolling by offering an apple to Adam. That fruit contained Capital Sins, such as Lust, Envy and Greed, among others.
Adam fell for it. He took a bite of the apple...and...Shazam! There he was instantaneously staring at Eve's proportions and curves. The rest we all know.
What we did not know is why God, who had given names to these two human beings, neglected to assign one to the snake. But if you remember, the snake was actually the devil, disguised, of course. So God opted to leave the chore of naming the snake to Satan himself.
Satan, who also exercised his influence to write his own rebuttal of the Bible, waited 2007 years after the birth of Christ to assign a name to the snake. He had to be sure that he would not make a mistake and that he was choosing the most appropriate name for it. That is why it took him such a long time. But it was worth the wait, especially because the snake is still alive.
He named the snake...ANN COULTER.
And now we know for sure that God had nothing to do with it.
Note by the writer: You skinny bonny legs, bleached hair, unpleasant voice, frustrated snake, we finally know who you really are. You, in spite of the arrogance you display to hide that inferiority complex, you are that SNAKE!
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3 comments:
ahhhhh.... makes total sense now!
thanks :)
This is True what more can i say its brilliant
Ann Coulter is a real low-life, attention sucking, media vampiring whore, who would lustily sell her own children, if she were so lucky as to be impregnated, just to move ahead on the republican food chain. She stinks of lies, she rots of retardism, and her persona non-gratis, should be more like a persona non-existentia. Her delusions of becoming a human being, are just that. Delusions. Here republican revelry of rebellion against the notion of a pure and good existence is repugnant beyond redemption. If she were to be compared to a piece of shit in a bag, the only difference would be the bag. Her cuntlike, loathsome and self-righteous arrogance is the stuff of demons, dictators and derelicts.
Whatever morsel of atoms leftover should be smashed and obliterated to prevent the possible future cloning of such a lousy homo sapien example.
Other than that she's okay.
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